LOOKING BACK AND MOVING FORWARD {PLUS A NEW BELLY PICTURE}
For the past few weeks, I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life. I have been thinking about decisions I have made, both good and bad. Things I wish I could have done differently if given the chance. I have been living life lately through a lot of “what ifs” and “I wish I would ofs.” For anyone who has ever done that, that can create a lot of “sadness” (for a lack of better words) in your current life.
Living in the past instead of the present is really no way to live at all.
I know it’s not healthy for me to do this. I know that there is no rewind button that I can press, no matter how much I beg, plead, cry or pray. I just have to deal with the hand that I have chosen to play with and make the most out of it. I still have the future to plan for and my goal is to actually apply the life lessons that I have learned from my past to make my future better, not just for me but for my children as well.
I am the soon-to-be mother of five, and I have to set an example for them no matter what.
I can feel my body preparing for the new baby to come. At seven months pregnant and already two centimeters dilated, I have a feeling that my new baby-to-be won’t be waiting until July 10th to make his/her presence. I have already started nesting and I have the uncontrollable urge to organize and clean everything at home. The sad thing? I haven’t actually bought anything for the baby yet. I don’t know what I’m waiting on. Possibly for some unforeseen money to drop out of the sky or a very rich nonexistent relative to feel nice enough to pass along some extra moula.
Either way I have less than two months to buy the basic essentials.
I truly thought that my youngest son was my last child and I got rid of everything. It’s a good thing that it’s yard sale season and that I will be able to hopefully find some of the bigger essential items for a really good price. (I still have my $50 baby crib that was found at a yard sale.)
I’ll also be doing a lot of downsizing in the next two to three months. It has always been one of my life goals to start on the road to home ownership before I turn thirty years old. I have two and a half years left to begin on my goal, and with me currently living on one income I won’t be able to get there if I continue to live above my means. My rent alone is more than one paycheck so I don’t see an opportunity for me to save any money continuing to live where I live now.
That means that for at least the next year or two I will be moving into a two bedroom apartment/townhouse/condo/home in order to save money for a down payment.
I know that for a short amount of time that it’s going to be a tight squeeze, but at least I will be with my boys and I will have the opportunity to save money for a down payment on a home that is perfect for us. My goal is to live on less than $1200 per month and save any extra money that I make towards my down payment goal. Right now my expenses are well over $1700 and that doesn’t even include groceries. That is WAY above my means and it’s time for me to scale back.
So, of course, the natural thing for me to do is chronicle my journey here on my website. (*wink*) I will be posting videos and pictures of me downsizing from my current home to my new home, as well as how I am cutting my budget to start saving for a downpayment. My “penny pinching” methods will be getting a lot tighter as I have slacked off a little bit due to the comfort I had “before” of living on two incomes. Now being a single mommy with a single income my penny pinching methods are going to become a lot more creative in the near future.
I hope you’ll join me on my new journey. This should be interesting.
26 Comments
Leave a Comment
PRINTABLE COUPONS
DAILY EMAIL UPDATES
Sign up for my daily newsletter to get updated once a day whenever I update my website.
ADS FOR MOMS
GRAB MY BUTTON
<div align="center"><a href="http://pennypinchingdiva.com" title="Penny Pinching Diva" target="_blank"><img src="http://i276.photobucket.com/albums/kk10/entirepackage/Sidebar%20Photos/PPDLinkButton.png" alt="Penny Pinching Diva" style="border:none;" /></a></div>
I’M ON TWITTER
Every time you are tempted to live in the past, just look at your beautiful little boys and realize that they would not exist without the very specific set of circumstances, both good AND bad that brought them into being. I have days when I am very introspective, and it is emotionally very tough, but I always end up realizing that if I changed anything in my past, some very good things wouldn’t have been able to happen.
Dear Jennifer,
I am seriously my own worse enemy. No one can be as harsh or as mean to me as I am. I know that if I changed even one second of the past, my present could be different and I may not have my beautiful babies. (And boy do I love them too death.) I just always have those moments of thinking if maybe I could have done something better “back then” to make their “now” a little bit better.
I just hate the reflective days that I do have. I guess my days would be better if I had close friends down here, but I just really feel all alone. Being a mom full time and working full time doesn’t make for a very interesting social life. That is why I cherish the friends that I have made online because they understand and can relate to what I’m going through.
Take care,
Shynea
I normally don’t reply to blogs but I have been reading yours now for about 6 months maybe longer and I understand your dilema on wanting to purchase a house and live the “American” Dream. I am a mother of four with very limited income and I was able to purchase a house through Habitat for Humanity, many people think this is not a hand out but it is not….. you have to have good or decent credit and you make a mortgage based on the materials that were purchased to build your house. I have been through alot and I wanted to share a blessing I received (in me obtaining a house)and share my blessing with you. Please just look into it and make a decision that is best for you!!!
Dear Carolyn,
I have actually hear a lot of good things about Habitat for Humanity. That is definitely something that I am going to research on my path to home ownership. I don’t think of this as a hand out at all, because in Florida you actually have to do so many volunteer hours on your home as well. Thank you so much for reminding me about this organization. I know that there are a few criteria that I have to meet and this option is not closed to me at all. Thank you for sharing your blessing with me because this is something that I am very serious about.
Take care,
Shynea
Sounds like we’re in the same boat right now. I’ve been a single mother for 9 years and just recently got bit by the “homeownership bug”. I am currently downsizing from a 3 bedroom house to a 2 bedroom apartment in hopes of paying off some of my debt and saving for a downpayment. I look forward to going through this journey with you.
~Chineze
Dear Chineze,
I didn’t know we were in the same boat. I have always known I wanted to have my own home for years now, I just set a cap at 30. I know that if I don’t do it by then then I will continue to procrastinate. I just don’t picture myself over 60 years old paying a mortgage. So, downsizing it is. I don’t mind. It just means a little tighter fit but I’ll also get rid of some unnecessary junk. It’ll also give me time to start getting my credit in order as well.
Take care,
Shynea
I just love seeing baby bellies! You are gorgeous Shynea!
I look forward to reading your journey.
Dear Crystal,
Thank you so much for the compliment.
On most days I feel like an elephant. Wobbling and duck walking all over the place. *smiles* I plan on putting everything on here about my journey because I hope to be able to help someone else or at least be motivational.
Take care,
Shynea
I didnt know you were single now. Im sorry things didnt turn out they way you wouldve liked, but like you said, you have to look out for you and your children.
Best of luck.
Oh, Lets us know if your having a girl…I have tons of girl items to giveaway, especially since I’m having a boy this time around. I’m sure many of your readers would be willing to help you out..especially considering all the money saving coupons, freebies, and articles that you have posted to help us save money.
Dear MommySavesAlot,
I have now come to grasp with the concept that life will never turn out as I expect/want it to be. I am now trying to take one day at a time and just go with the flow.
I will definitely let everyone know what I am having as soon as I find out. I’m excited myself. I wanted to wait, but the curiosity is killing me.
Take care,
Shynea
You’re a very smart woman, Shynea! Stop living in the past, you’ve thought about it, it happened, just be grateful you and the boys are ok. You will survive and come out on top. I’m a single mom of three 11, 12,16; if I can make it you can. Yes, I agree; I too will examine my unnecessary spending habits. Thanks so much for you!
Dear Michelle,
I was a single mom with my first two for the longest, so I definitely know that I have the “drive” to do it. Emotionally? That is another question. It is always nice to have someone else to lean on, but sometimes the strongest person that you have is yourself.
I think my first triumph will be cutting back on unnecessary spending. It’s going to be hard, but I did it once before so I know I can do it again.
Take care,
Shynea
Hey pretty lady! Your belly is getting so big…I wonder if we’ll be able to find out what you’re having before the baby gets here! I sent you my address on your email. If you’re having a girl, let me know and I can send you some things. I just got done organizing all of the old baby clothes by size (yay!), so it will be easy to get some things together to send you (and I’m serious, so I don’t wanna hear any no’s). And please know that you can email me if you ever need to vent or need a pep talk
Keep that head up girl!
Dear K.O.,
Hey mama! How have you been doing lately? How is that beautiful baby girl? I received your email with your address and I will be sending mine today. (Sorry it took me a few days. I have been bogged down with the darn flu and I can’t take anything for it.) Yay for baby clothes! Now, hopefully this little bambino is a girl.
I have your email address, and since you gave me an open invitation, I’m going to use it.
Take care,
Shynea
hey girl,
i am so proud of you! you are handling ur business lik u r suppose too. I tip my hat off 2 you! you should give yourself more credit becuase u are so strong and bold! not too many women out there who can do what u do! I have a surprise for you and the baby, I will be sending it off in June.
huggs kisses,
kenesha
Dear Kenesha,
Don’t tip your hat to me yet. Give me 18 years and then we’ll see if I’m raising normal kids. lol I have no choice but to take care of business because I realize that if I don’t do it, no one else will. Oooh! Did I hear you say a surprise. I HATE surprises because I’m too nosey. (Why must you torture me like that?) So, since you’re sending off surprises, how about dinner on me for your entire family? I’m sending YOU something in the mail this weekend.
Take care,
Shynea
girl you didn’t have to do that..(well im not complaining…lol). you deserve it. you have been through so much in the last couple of months and you are overcoming it. im proud of you. women like you need to be recongize and rewarded!
While I am not an everyday visitor I am always wiling to give away extra coupons. I also wanted to remind you to look into WIC and foodstamps. You paid your taxes you deserve some of the benefits. Also don’t forget to look into HUD housing. God bless and keep your chin up.
I think you have are on the right track. and I hope and pray everything works out for you and the kids..Iagree with the alane try to get the assistance while its available to you,and keep the belly pics coming we love them!!
1st off Mama you look Hot! Amazingly beautiful. HOW exciting.
Good luck to you in your adventures and sometimes the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Hubby wishes we got into a town home facility where someelse took care of the yard work. NOt sure what he is thinking someone else does….ME!
Good luck to wish you the best
You make pregnancy look good.
First, you are gorgeous!!
Second, you can do this. There are so many other women who have done this for YEARS, and you are STRONG, and beautiful, and talented, and smart, you can do anything! Keep your head up, and if you want to look back someday, go ahead. Remember the struggles, remember the tears, remember everything because it made you who you are today.
You are so beautiful and glowing! Good luck to you on your new journey. It may be a tough road but you can do it!
I’ve been following your blog for a few months, and I just want to tell you that you can do it! If God brings you to it, he’ll bring you through it. You remind me alot of myself-I’m a single mother of 3 boys: 20, 18, and 16 and I waited until I had all of them to go back to college. We’ve had some really tough times, but we’ve had way more wonderful times as a family. My sons always had everything they’ve ever needed and almost all the things they wanted. Somehow, they went to private schools and participated in activities that helped them to grow into wonderful young men. And when you are a single mom, your boys grow up to take care of you! We are incurable DIYers and we’ve learned how to make my one income stretch (which is how I found YOUR website!). I have a son in college and another just received a full scholarship to his favorite institution. You and your kids will be fine, as long as you keep your priorities in order.
Keep your head up and Take care,
Kia
Congrats on the baby girl and your decision to start on the path to homeownership. Try a program call NACA it is a really great program and you can purchase your home anywhere in Jacksonville. They work with you and your credit doesn’t have to be perfect and your interest can be as low as 0%.
wow u have really touched me i can somewhat feel ur pain even now i am married and i still feel that i am alone sometimes i wish i was because how can a person get over if their other keeps bringing them down love should not make u dumb. i raise my two kids plus his two that stays with us and the two that doesnt get the same amount of love and time from me as well and i do it all withouth his help his thankyou his nothing. thanks for being a inspiration